Self-Acceptance, Sangha, and Service

Gasshō,

 “This is the true joy of Life, the being used for a purpose recognized by
yourself as a mighty one...the being a force of Nature instead of a
feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that
the world will not devote itself to making you happy.” - George Bernard Shaw

I love quotes. Perhaps that’s because my mind naturally organizes itself into one-liners—t-shirts and bumper stickers. Or perhaps it’s because a short, pithy statement such as the one above moves me to a visceral understanding that is impossible to get when the head is more engaged. All of which is no doubt why Zen has always fascinated me. You have to see it and get it. Now! If you noodle it, it’s gone. Like getting a joke or needing to have it explained. If it has to be explained, don’t bother. It’s too late.

“Love yourself and be awake—today, tomorrow, always.” - The Buddha
Even with a quote such as this, we can have either a response or a reaction depending on whether we are at center or identified with egocentric, karmic conditioning as we read it. At center, the response is a reality-shifting, direct hit: “Whoa, loving this previously assumed to be flawed little human is the way to be awake; and that love must be constant, each moment, all day, every day. Wow! This is huge!” From conditioning, the reaction is something along these lines: “Yeah, yeah, sure, I know that, it’s just one more impossible good idea.”

“Compassionate toward yourself, you reconcile all beings in the world.” - Lao-Tzu
From center, we read Lao-Tzu’s sentence and get something like a temporary loss of breath and stunned silence, often followed by a desire to find a meditation cushion and sit down for a while. This is obviously too big for any thoughts. From ego, it will be more like, “Yeah (egocentric, karmic conditioning starts a lot of sentences with a bored, knowing, sarcastic affirmative), I am going to reconcile all beings single-handedly. Give me a break.” If not in its superior mode, it will likely start screaming, whining, or moaning something like, “But I can’t, it’s too hard, I don’t understand…”

Of course, having a reaction from egocentric, karmic conditioning is no reason to allow egocentric, karmic conditioning to prevent self-acceptance. The fact that egocentric, karmic conditioning has been such a dominant player in our lives is the reason self-acceptance is essential. That’s why the Buddha exhorted us to love our self.

In fact, I will make these bold statements:

Self-acceptance is the be-all and end-all of human existence.
If there is such a thing as a purpose to human existence, that purpose is self-acceptance.
A lack of self-acceptance is the cause of suffering.
Self-acceptance is the ending of suffering.
Self-acceptance is the greatest act of service to all life. (Reconciling all beings.)

No wonder egocentric, karmic conditioning beats so hard on the drum of self-hate. No wonder those voices of “something wrong” and “not enough” are working over-time to get people to believe they are unworthy and unlovable. (Keep in mind that dissatisfaction keeps an ego at the center of the universe.)

Jesus said, “As you do unto the least of my brethren, so do you unto me.” Who among us has not considered our own self as the least of the brethren? From center, you get this, yes? Not only this simple little Zen teacher but also some of the greatest minds in the history of humanity are telling you that having lovingkindness, compassion, and unconditional acceptance for your self is the thing to do. From center, we get this. Egocentric, karmic conditioning, with its tireless energy and unwavering attention, is doing everything it can to make us forget our highest purpose. How can we help ourselves to remember?

As you doubtless know, we have been focusing a lot on the Fifth Annual Golden Gate Bridge Walk on Sept. 23 to aid vulnerable children in Zambia. (I hope you’ll be there—first at the Bridge Walk, then in Zambia!) Part of that focus is inviting people to raise money for the event. (You know, the one about a hundred people asking ten friends to donate a hundred dollars.) We’ve even created a little video of the first one hundred children we’re feeding and schooling to put a face, actually one hundred faces, on the project. (It’s on the Living Compassion website.)

I’ve been getting feedback from people that they don’t like fundraising, that there is big resistance to fundraising. “Fundraising is scary.” I agree. I’ve never framed it as scary—I just hated it. “I don’t like to ask anyone for anything.” I know. Me either. So, if it’s scary and unpleasant and difficult, why should we do it?

“If we don’t have something larger to serve, we will self-serve.” Jinny Ditzler

 “We will do for the love of others what we would never be willing to do for ourselves.” Dupont Roshi

We must apply the tools of our practice to that I-can’t/don’t-want-to-do-this-because-it-makes-me-uncomfortable nonsense. We have to do hard, scary stuff because that’s the fastest way to flush out egocentric, karmic conditioning and end its suffering ways. We need to do this for all of us. There is no “someone else.” There is no “other.” There’s just us. I ask you to do something for me and you ask me to do something for you and there we are, we’re a team. Sangha is the team. Workshops, retreats, books and CDs, programs like reflective listening buddies, (not on your own, with Sangha—on your own is just ego looking for opportunities), and the radio show are all opportunities to participate, to join the Sangha team, to be involved, to go beyond the “intimacy” of a primary relationship with egocentric, karmic conditioning.

The Buddha awakened on his own. Twenty-five hundred years later people still marvel. You and I may not have that combination of willingness, intelligence, and drive in this lifetime. The Buddha suspected we might not, and for that reason he taught us to take refuge in Bodhi (awakening), Dharma (teachings/practice) and Sangha (those who practice.) “How joyful to look upon the awakened and to keep company with the wise.” - The Buddha

Returning to our original topic of self-acceptance (and tying these three topics of Self-acceptance, Sangha, and Service together), we turn to Secret of the Universe #14: If, as soon as you become aware of something about your self that self-hate is ready to pounce on, you wrap your self in a blanket of unconditional self-acceptance, you will be thrown into heaven instead of hell. Right in that moment. Not later after you’ve worked out the details of the whole issue. Right then. And it doesn’t matter how supposedly hideous and heinous your sin or crime, the sequence is: see it, accept it, joy. And then you bring all that clarity, acceptance, and joy to the rest of us.

I highly encourage you to seek out those situations in life that push all of conditioning’s buttons. (You may have noticed that I attempt to provide as many of those as I can.) With practice, you will realize that every time conditioning reacts you can wrap your self in acceptance and prove that clarity and joy are the result. Soon you will recognize yourself to be a “force of Nature,” spreading wisdom and compassion wherever you go. It’s a very good thing to do with a life.

In gasshō,
Cheri

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