I identify urgency by ego's bossiness, tight shoulders, shallow breathing, elevated heartrate and by behaviors such as double-checking and struggling to remember things. If I do things in a certain way and think of everything then everything will be okay. Listening to "I choose trust and joy" recordings repeatedly. R/L
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I’m projecting that listening to those recordings is what makes it easy for you to identify ego’s shenanigans, is that so? You’re listening to “I choose trust and joy” and conditioning tries to sneak in some urgency about getting everything right so you’ll be okay. The two messages sound and feel so different there’s no confusion about what’s coming from where. True? As we let go of that illusion of control and learn to cherish being present to Life unfolding the need to remember everything just falls away. So relaxing! Gassho
Seeing ease/unease as a canary for below-the-radar stories/conversations. Unease = a Jaws soundtrack playing somewhere. But that doesn't mean there's an actual Jaws!!! It's like hearing Jaws and then cutting to pulling back the curtain on the Wizard of Oz. Let's get Mentor on that mic! R/L Gassho
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That’s EXACTLY what it’s like—Jaws is playing in the background but there’s no actual shark. People who were traumatized by that movie hear the soundtrack and get scared on dry land! Those are the kinds of egocentric karmic conditioning/self-hate connections we’re trying to see through. Training ourselves to get attention on the Mentor, on thisherenow, is the way to break those karmic associations. Gassho
It occurred to me to stop wondering if I am doing the right best thing and prepare for the interviews coming next month. No more wasting time being in the conversation. R/L
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YES! Yes, indeed. Always. That’s what we’re doing. We’re getting out of the conversation and focusing attention on what is so NOW. Perhaps what is so now is something to do to prepare for the interviews next month—and that something is happening NOW. What is NOT happening NOW is wondering, noodling, ruminating, speculating, etc. We get HERE and allow Life to inform. Gassho
It is so plain this is a process. The content feels special because it's my child but I can see the process working elsewhere and it's exactly the same. The content is a tool for EKconditioning/ SelfHate. Ready to protect this person from that..Next step to REMEMBER that commitment? R/L
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Yes. The reason R/L is so important for us is that it takes away egocentric karmic conditioning/ self-hate’s ability to obscure our insights. It distracts and people get caught up in something “new,” which never is, and forget what we know to be true. You’ve seen this is a process that catches you in suffering. Recording that insight and listening to it every day is how you’re not going to get fooled into forgetting. Keeping awareness on that particular bamboozle is going to go a long way toward freeing you from a particular pernicious con. Gassho
Money was easier to "control" when single. I saved a lot, had "my" priorities. Now, with a wife who has more of a "spend" orientation, and these expensive kids, “my” money feels out of control. And perhaps all of this is the story I need to drop! R/L. Gassho
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Well, yes, that is ultimately no doubt the case, however it’s never either/or. You have a concern about the amount of money people are spending verses saving. That seems like a family issue, doesn’t it? If one person in a family is struggling it’s likely the whole family is struggling. It may not be terribly obvious, but I bet it is. There’s strife between husband and wife, strife between father and children. It may not be huge, but it doesn’t take much strife to affect a family’s wellbeing. How would you make it different? Can you look at the specifics and come up with a proposal that would please you? Could be a jumping off place for a good discussion. Gassho
How does projection as friend work?
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You have 50 words in which to express yourself in this class. If you really want a perspective on your issue it would be helpful to use enough of those 50 words to be clear about what you’re exploring. We could say that projection works well as friend but I doubt that’s what you’re asking. Gassho
Yes! That conversation is so sneaky! It comes in with such "logical arguments." Starts with a simple observation and snowballs into "and then this, that, other." R/L'd to support dropping conversation. Reminders of what is so NOW. When I return to presence, so clear what was story. Seeing so much!
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Good! The difficulty you’re catching on to is that when we’re in an egocentric karmic conditioning/self-hate conversation the “one” who is speaking and the “one” who is listening are in cahoots. Ego is talking to ego and ego agrees absolutely with what ego has to say. We step out of that pas de deux and wonder what in the heck we were thinking. Fact of the matter is, we weren’t. “You” weren’t there at all. What’s meant to happen is that you get “awakened” after the dance with a shocked voice asking something along the lines of, “What in the world is the matter with you?” Sneaky indeed. We must be quicker still. Gassho
I focused on being satisfied with what my life is now and I felt more present and connected. was less distracted by the pull into what I didn’t do / wish I’d done. Things felt calmer and still missed the feeling of having more energy and “excitement.”
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It is possible to be satisfied with what your life is now (feeling present and connected) AND do whatever Life calls you to do that’s energizing and exciting. It’s NEVER either/or. What usually happens is that Life offers, “You could do X.” “You could do Y.” “You could do Z,” and karma is muttering “nah, I don’t want to do that.” Why? Because going with Life’s plan doesn’t result in suffering and ego is always in pursuit of suffering. Gassho
With awareness/”knowing” how I feel, a natural desire to communicate those feelings arises. Acting on that desire when it arises squeezes out conversation with ego. When I didn’t act, had opportunity to make two-handed recording. With love and support from Mentor, sent the communication. Experience of practicing wholeness. R/L
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“Wholeness” is the word, isn’t it? When acting from/with/in the moment we don’t need anything from anyone else. Someone doesn’t understand what you mean? That’s okay. Someone doesn’t give an answer you’d hope for? That’s okay. What matters to you is that you’re in touch with how you’re feeling and you’re communicating. That’s satisfaction! Gassho
Every day, the practice. Things aren’t better with my “thorny challenge.” Although the kitchen is clean and today I found my grandmother’s ring, which has been lost for 12 years, and I was gifted with a $300 coupon from a company I do business with often. So things are opening. R/L
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Really? Things aren’t any better? Life is giving you rings and money…. Yep, it does seem as if things are opening up and I’m going to encourage you not to close any doors with statements such as “things aren’t better,” okay? Things are better! You’ve got a clean kitchen, a ring, and a $300 coupon to prove it! You can just say “thank you” and watch for the next opening Life sends your way. It’s fun, isn’t it? Who knows what’s coming next…. Gassho
if it's a workshop:I don't shame/abandon myself no matter what. So I can lose it all, All illusions, forms. I'm left with myself. Ego doesn't believe it, shockingly. Thinks it will be disastrous, or painful. (is already.) Additionally my relationship is strained and I've been down. Feels scary.
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First, “You” never shame and abandon “yourself.” The voices of self-hate, in service to egocentric karmic conditioning, shame and abandon you. (Actually we wish they would abandon us but they won’t!) You’re afraid to take this step because you’re a “spiritual person” and people will think badly of you if you want to make enough money to support your family, correct? To be a “spiritual person” tortured by voices of “what would people think/you could lose it all,” sort of disqualifies us, right? Sounds as if you’ve made (a bit of?) peace with the notion that you could “lose it all.” It’s all illusion anyway, just stuff, all made up. Yes? But ego really wants you to stay in fear. Why? Because that’s how you’ll keep giving it all the attention. As soon as you face down ego’s predictions of disastrous and “just too” painful to bear, you’ll be free---regardless of the outcome. Yes? I can imagine this sort of stress will put a strain on a relationship and get a person down. That’s what’s making you even more vulnerable to the fear. Grab that spiritual warrior courage, feel it straighten your spine, and step out to take your place as a spiritual hero. You can do this! Gassho
Guide’s response totally threw conditioning. Revealed layer of unseen karma: This human is NOT allowed to express strong emotion-EVER! Conditioned beliefs: there’s a “right/spiritual way to feel & act. If I’m REALLY practicing people won’t see strong emotion from me.” There is shame/fear re: people witnessing my strong emotion. Wow! R/L
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And we know what wants to keep that bamboozle going, don’t we? Heck, there’s no really good suffering generated by self-expressed people. We need big amounts of repression, suppression, and depression for big amounts of suffering. If we keep in mind ego’s motivation in generating that shame and fear, what’s it like to consider going all Italian? Passion! That’s what we’re talking about. Life is PASSIONATE and you get to express that passion. Gassho